Nigeria is a very interesting place to live in. The energy of the populace, the witticism, the never-say-die attitude of the people can even dare the devil. Some commentators have opined that Nigerians generally are good people- heckled only by bad, terrible and greedy leadership across the land.
To stay alive in Nigeria, you cannot afford to be too serious with life. You have to find a way of unwinding, relaxing and taking a light view of things. So today, we look at five ways Nigerians “sort themselves out” on weekends- to prepare to fight on in the new week.
Drink away your sorrows
To millions of Nigerians, the weekend is a great time to cool off, chill and unwind. Drinking for them is the most effective way of letting off steam, “cooling” their brains and re-setting their minds. Interestingly, you do not have to have a lot of money to enjoy the “luxury of a few bottles.” In most parts of Nigeria, there is always a party going on somewhere, a friend who is celebrating an anniversary or a birthday. If you cannot find a place to hang out and chill on Friday or Saturday, wait until Sunday, go to Church, there must be someone hosting a party in his house after thanksgiving. As they are going home, join them, take a seat at the reception and if after five minutes you are not served food and drinks, raise your voice and yell:can’t you people see I have been here for so long?
Attend parties with hidden “sacks”.Nigerians love to party as most foreigners can testify. It is hard to find a street in Lagos that is not hosting a party every weekend. Ditto for several other cities across most parts of the country. A social media joke I saw recently said that in one part of the country, a party is often held to celebrate the “success” of a previous party. That these parties happen is not the news. The funny thing is that in line with the harsh economic realities in the land, most persons now consider it foolish to attend these parties without a “sack” tucked into their hand bags- the ladies can testify. What do they do with these “sacks?” Well, there is no prize for guessing: the sacks (polythene bags, Bagco Bages) are used to pack food and drinks. Bottles of beer, bottles of Soda, cans of soft drinks, wines and packs of juices. Nothing is too big to be stuffed into the “sack.” I heard that some pack whole coolers of food as soon as they arrive, tuck them under their tables and still raise hell about not being served food.
Strange things happen
Sleep till mid-day on Saturday, then complain that the weekend is too short. Well, Nigerians- especially those living in the urban areas pass through a lot stress. The average Lagosian spends more than 15 hours a week swimming through the city traffic. The volume of noise on the streets, the bad air we inhale as we walk or drive through and ultimately- the endless heartaches that come from the sad developments across the land is enough to wreck the mental health of anyone- however strong they may be. Well, thank God for the weekends and the fact that we do not have to pay for sleep. For those who can afford a decent space to lay their heads, the weekend is a great time to sleep away their troubles, forget about disagreements with their bosses and supervisors at work and pretend that Monday would never come. Do not forget that many Nigerians party into the night every Friday so for them, Saturday morning is a great time to offset their arrears of sleep deficiency. Sadly, by 4am on Monday, the reality dawns on us that another week is here and if the bills must be paid, we must hit the road in 30 minutes to sign the attendance register, open the shop or make that job application.
Pick up quarrel with neighbours or settle old feud with family members.
Weekends are not just for jolly good times. It is also a great opportunity to settle old scores, annoy someone or wreck the mental health of another person. It begins early Saturday mornings when Mama Obi washes her children’s cloths and let the water spill to Mama Funke’s kitchen. Those who live in public yards would also remember the endless meetings called to decide who washes the bathrooms or who did not pack the waste bin on Wednesday. For some, it is about levy collection and the endless disputes that go with it. How about landlords that target their tenants on Saturday mornings to remind them that they promised to pay their rent three months ago? Weekends are for drama, provocations and shouting matches- especially in neighbourhoods where the drastic effects of “change” are most felt.
Attend events they are not invited to.
Well, a lot of people get bored on weekends owing to “lack of activity” and you know, nobody can sleep from Friday to Monday. To cure this boredom, you find people gate-crashing into events they have not been invited to. A bouncer in one of the clubs in Wuse area of Abuja told me that every Saturday evening, he and his colleagues have a hectic time restricting people from gaining entry into the club because they are either not properly dressed or as he put it “from their looks, you can see that they are just here to create nuisance for others.” You may argue that people should respect themselves and stay at home when they have nowhere to go but then, that advice is not one many are willing to heed. On weekends, we just find out where it is happening and troop there, who cares about invitation cards when boys are hungry, bored or just want to find something to talk about?
